January 15th, 2003

Self-Portrait 3

(no subject)

I can't remember the last time I got more than five uninterrupted hours of sleep. In spite of not falling asleep until 1 am, I woke up at 5:30 this morning for no reason at all, and just as I was getting tired enough to fall asleep again my alarm went off.

That's pretty much been my sleeping pattern for the past four weeks or so, and it's =really= starting to wear me down. I've been in a shitty mood since this time last week that pretty much reached it's zenith yesterday, thanks to the (apparently carefully orchestrated) incidence of one complete asshole after another needing to talk to me, or ask me about something, or needing a favor from me, or perhaps just wanting to piss me off. At least, I hope yesterday was the zenith, because if I have to put up with much more of this bullshit I'll just go home and clean out my skull with the .45. I realized about six months ago that I couldn't think of a single reason not to kill myself, and my life has gotten oh so much worse since then.