August 7th, 2003

Self-Portrait 3

(no subject)

-- They're talking about the California governor's recall on tv, of course. In the minute and a half it took me to check out at the Corner I heard the anchor on Fox News mispronounce Arnold Schwarzeneggar's name as "Shwartzanigger" no less than three times. Then again, it's Fox News, so what can you do? I'm surprised they didn't segue to Bill O'Reilley with "... I wonder how Shwartzanigger's campaign will go? Over to you, Bill."

"Thanks, Bob. And speaking of niggers, boy, I sure do hate those black motherfuckers. In other news, the war in Iraq is being waged like a mob family on a vendetta hit. But everybody over there is brown, so who cares? That's up on the Factor, next."

-- Warren Ellis, writer extraordinaire who's on the web at Die Puny Humans and, among others, is in the process of writing "LISTENER: A book for the Internet in sixty entries", completely on his LiveJournal. Which I think is totally cool. It's at mistersleepless.
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Self-Portrait 3

Good. Sweet. CHRIST. I'm bored.

Perusing --

This whole "flash mob" thing -- I can't decide if it's more totally gay than it is ridiculously pretentious, or more ridiculously pretentious than it is totally gay. Either way, it's lame, asinine, stupid, and completely pointless. Even if the entire point of something is to be pointless, it's still pointless.

Millions abandon their landline phones and go cellular -- Congratulations, loser. I did that three years ago. Man, I don't get anywhere near the credit I deserve for being an innovator. This whole leather wristband thing? I started doing that back in March of '96. Long black trenchcoat? I used to rock that shit back in fucking '89. Not trying to brag, I just want credit where credit is due. Recognize, bitch.

-- I dug my old combat boots out of my closet this weekend, and I put them on this morning. Now I remember why I quit wearing these things: because I was intending to buy some insoles for them. It feels like I'm walking on uneven, rocky ground. My feet are killing me.

-- The free sample ridiculousness continues, but it appears to have reached its zenith. At least I hope it has, because if it's going to get weirder than this I don't wanna know about it. I got a free sample tampon today, adressed to Ms. Cockrell. I'm curious about, and rather disturbed by, how this could have happened.

-- While I'm thinking about it, can somebody explain to me what the appeal of Alias is? At first I wouldn't watch it just on general principle, because concept-wise, it's a COMPLETE rip-off of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but the lead is a spy instead of a monster killer. The fact that Alias has always gotten critical accolades while Buffy went unnoticed still pisses me off. But then I started reading plot descriptions of the episodes, and it sounds like crap. Generic spy plots + daytime soap opera cliches. Her dad is a good double agent, her mom is a bad double agent? WEAK. Her roommate gets replaced by an evil clone? ASS. Also, I watched five minutes of an episode and saw the main character and her father communicate secretly in the presence of the bad guys by blinking messages in Morse code. COCKPUNCH. Also, Jennifer Garner is not pretty. Pants-tighteningly hot, yes, but not pretty. Fantastic uniform; shitty helmet.
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