August 31st, 2005

Humpin'

(no subject)

So, a pirate walks into a bar, and he's got a humongous steering wheel sticking out the front of his pants. It's so big he has to turn sideways to get in the door. The bartender looks at him and he goes, "Hey, buddy, you've got a steering wheel sticking out of the front of your pants." The pirate looks at him and goes, "Arrrrr, I know. The damn thing's drivin' me nuts!"
Self-Portrait 3

(no subject)

Translation of the previous explosion of bullshit: I yet live, and all the people in the world that I give a damn about made it through the vagaries of the weather safe and sound. My only unfortunate circumstance is that I haven't had power since 6:30 yesterday afternoon, and I'm not terribly hopeful that said situation will have been ameliorated by the time I get home tonight. Ah well. Such is life.
Self-Portrait 3

(no subject)

Did I say 6:30 yesterday afternoon? I meant 6:30 Monday afternoon. I went home to check the power situation, and as it turns out I'm now working on day 3 without electricity. From a purely "Death over weakness, death over despair, death over personal gain" standpoint, it really isn't that bad. It makes getting ready for work in the morning and getting to bed at night much easier and much faster processes, and picking a book in the dark and going outside to read is surprisingly liberating; I recommend everyone try to do it at least once a week. On the down side, not being able to eat food that requires refridgeration and/or heated preparation kind of fucking sucks, and I'd kick you in the nuts for a long hot shower. I haven't shaved in almost a week, and it's entirely possible that I stank.

But fear not, Alabama Power is on the case! According to their website, which I just checked --

-- Estimated Restoration Time: 08/30/05 16:00

Trouble Located - Crew Dispatched

Hell yeah. They're all over that shit.

And to add insult to injury, guess what I got in the mail today? My light bill.

Fuckers.
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Captain America

And people wonder why I have no faith in humanity.