Also, it's entirely possible that I'm a complete fucking idiot. Entirely possible. I take it for granted just how good I've got it with no effort on my part at all. I just sit back on my ass and let the world go by and, quite frankly, I'm the shit. If I'd just grow a pair and step up, I would stride amongst you like unto some victorious and conquering golden god, the master of all I see, demanding my rightful tibute of the finest meats and cheeses in all the land.
Hurm. Why has it taken me this long to figure out how much fun it is to be me?